Get well soon

Backs can be a bitch. I can relate very closely to this at the moment because my girlfriend was admitted into hospital yesterday with a severely displaced disk in her back. She was in an immense amount of pain and couldn’t even bend over far enough to put her shoes on.

When I spoke to her this morning she’d just been administered a large dose of Morphine and about head off into the land of the fairies, hopefully somewhere pain-free. She’s having an MRI scan before having a discussion about whether surgery might be necessary. Hopefully not, but if they do they’ll remove the disk then fuse the two vertebrae together – not the most pleasant of experiences I’m sure but at least it should provide a big improvement in what is proving to be a chronic back problem.

So, hope you’re feeling much better soon sweetheart.

Not dead yet

Bugger me, it’s been quiet on here for a bit eh?

Well, I’ve got a few things to stick up here soon but I need to upload some photos onto Flickr first. I’ve been away again with my lovely girlfriend and I’m sure that there are one or two nice photos of our trip that I’d like to share.

In the meantime there’s plenty of other things on the internet to be reading. Carry on.

The statues

There are two statues in a park; one of a nude man and one of a nude woman. They had been facing each other across a pathway for a hundred years, when one day an angel comes down from the sky and, with a single gesture, brings the two to life.

The angel tells them, “As a reward for being so patient through a hundred blazing summers and dismal winters, you have been given life for thirty minutes to do what you’ve wished to do the most.”

He looks at her, she looks at him, and they go running off together behind the shrubbery.

The angel waits patiently as the bushes rustle and giggling ensues. After fifteen minutes, the two return, out of breath and laughing.

The angel tells them, “Um, you have fifteen minutes left.”

The male statue asks the woman statue, “Would you like to do it again?”

“Oh ,yes let’s,” she replies! “But let’s change positions. This time, I’ll hold the pigeon down, and you shit on its head.”

Jolly nice weather we’re having




The Beach

Originally uploaded by rutty.

The British love nothing better than commenting on the weather. It’s what we do best, other than lose at football and drink beer. We have a spectacularly mediocre weather cycle – in the summer it’s usually cloudy, perhaps some drizzle. Usually the same in the winter but with extra drizzle.

In fact, the UK has three types of weather: it’s either raining, just rained or about to rain.

However, this summer has been very different. We’ve seen the sort of weather to make this green and pleasant land more like our close Mediterranean neighbours – it’s been sunny. And bloody hot!

We are not used to such scorching temperatures, unless we’re a regular visitor to Florida. People are having to water their weeds in their gardens to maintain that wild-flower look that is so popular. Cardigans and mittens have been put in storage. People are showing their knees in public – I’m even wearing shorts to work along with sock-less sandals. There’s not a cloud in the sky for us to bemoan.

I’m not sure if this is the best summer we’ve had since the oft-remembered 1977, but it must be getting near to it. Our summer is usually relegated to a weekend in June but this year has seen some of the best, uninterrupted sunshine that I can ever remember in this country.

Sod the hosepipe bans and threats of a drought – get out there and enjoy it. And don’t forget your suntan lotion.

(Note, the picture is actually of the beach in Toronto – I couldn’t be arsed actually venturing out and taking another one of the local weather. Article originally written on Newsvine).

Movable Type 3.31

I’ve just updated this site’s backend with the latest version of Movable Type – version 3.31. The upgrade process was very, very easy and seems to have gone rather well. Not much has changed, although I gather that there are some new features in this release:

Tags: Describe your entries with tags so readers can easily find any content and subscribe to custom feeds.

Widgets: Arrange and manage your page just by dragging and dropping. Widgets can include your own content or content from other web services and feeds.

Activity Feeds: Reduce the burden of managing your blog by getting all the updates on comments and feedback on your blog, along with your blog’s activity, delivered via a secure custom feed.

New Blog Styles: Customize the look of your site with just a few clicks, without editing any HTML. Choose from dozens of unique designs and layouts.

Powerful Templating Language: Movable Type’s industry-leading template language is more powerful than ever, letting you choose exactly which content you want to display on your pages, as well as how it’s presented. Customize your entire site without having to do any programming.

I’ve noticed a couple of differences so far but I have no idea as of yet as to their purpose. There’s this one button that says “bigger” and another one says “smaller”. Hmmm, I need to read the new user manual.

If you get any issues then please let me know in the comments and I’ll try and get it sorted out.

Do not talk to the parrot

Mary’s dishwasher stopped working so she called the repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, “I’ll leave the key under the doormat. Fix the dishwasher, please, leave the bill on the counter, and I’ll post the cheque to you as soon as I come home.”

After thinking for a moment, she added, “By the way, don’t worry about my bulldog. He won’t bother you. But, whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances whatsoever, talk to my parrot. I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!”

When the repairman arrived at Mary’s house the next day, he discovered the largest, meanest-looking bulldog he had ever seen. But, just as Mary had told him, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.

The parrot, however, drove him completely nuts the whole time with his incessant screeching, cursing and name-calling. Finally, the repairman couldn’t contain himself any longer and yelled, “Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!”

To which the parrot replied, “GO GET HIM, SPIKE!”

I am a winner!




Lovely flowers

Originally uploaded by rutty.

OK, so “runner-up” would be more accurate, but I’ve attained a respectable almost-best position in a photo-competition at work.

There were three themes for this competition: nature, tranquility and motion. I entered four photos into each of the first two and failed miserably to find any motion photos.

Luckily for me I was presented with a runners-up prize for one of my nature entries – the one opposite, which shows some sort of tree or shrub branch from my “Spring” collection. Some lovely blossom there.

I won a framed version of my photo (nice and large!) plus a company t-shirt and cap. Oh yeah baby. I look great in this stuff.

In other news I’ve finally finished moving house and got my internet connected (at bloody last!) once I belatedly received my NTL broadband installation disk. This wireless connection is really solid too, so no cables for me!

The house is great – expect some photos soon.