An email from my MP

I’ve been supporting the Make Poverty History campaign for a little while now, as can be seen by the ribbon in the top right corner of my site, and I’ve used the campaign site to send automatically-generated emails to various figures of import within the government. I’ve sent messages to both Tony Blair and Gordon Brown, but neither of those slack bastards bothered to write back.

However, my local MP was a different matter. Nick Palmer is my local Labour MP (Broxtowe) and he surprisingly mailed me back with a response within a few hours of me sending my mail from the campaign site. It was obviously a cut and paste job, but it certainly appeared that he’d sent it himself, especially when I subsequently received two further emails – one to provide an attachment of a relevant paper he’d written for The Statesman which he’d forgotten to stick on the previous email and a second to apologise for accidentally leaving the name of the previous correspondant on my mail.

Apparently, he’s the Labour Party’s “specialist” on this campaign and he “strongly supports” it. This is good news, and I’ve asked to be kept informed via a mailing list on this whole debate. I’m not usually political, but this campaign has really interested me.

The noises from Gordon Brown were encouraging a few weeks ago, so we’ll see where this goes in the long run. Hopefully there’ll be large strides taken to eradicate poverty world-wide, but knowing how this government works, and to be fair just about every other government in the “developed” nations, there’ll be some compromise somewhere that’ll be no use to anyone.

Still, this is starting to pique my interest in the political spectrum. Perhaps I’ll start asking a few probing questions on local issues to Nick and see what sort of replies I get.

Glass Eye

I’ve not posted any jokes for a while, so here’s one courtesy of Kimbal:

A man who lived in a block of apartments thought it was raining and put his head out the window to check. As he did so a glass eye fell into his hand.

He looked up to see where it came from in time to see a young woman looking down.

“Is this yours?” he asked.

She said, “Yes, could you bring it up?” and the man agreed.

On arrival she was profuse in her thanks and offered the man a drink. As she was very attractive he agreed. Shortly afterwards she said, “I’m about to have dinner. There’s plenty. Would you like to join me?”

He readily accepted her offer and both enjoyed a lovely meal. As the evening was drawing to a close the lady said, “I’ve had a marvelous evening. Would you like to stay the night?”

The man hesitated then said, “Do you act like this with every man you meet?”

“No,” she replied, “Only those who catch my eye.”

Spam spam spam spam etc

While I was asleep those nice people at Spam Central have gone past the 10,000 attempted spam comments or trackbacks and are now sat on the impressive figure of 10,056 blocked attempts. That’s 10,056 times that you’ve wasted your server resources trying to leave unwanted free adverts to your shitty websites.

At least it gives me something to post about I suppose. Now, go and bother someone else – there’s going to be no spam left here.

Hmmmm, fooooooooood

I’ve come to the conclusion that there’s not a lot better in life than good food. I’d probably kill for a good feed. Well, maybe not, but I do really like my food, especially if it’s eaten in good company.

I’ve always praised Italian food over any other, but I’m starting to think that maybe Thai is a close second. Hmmmm, Thai.

Must go eat….

~David Rizzle

Check out this completely bonkers link: http://sites.gizoogle.com/?url=http://www.davidrutt.me.uk.

It “tranmutliates” your site, any site, into some sort of rude jingo fo shizzle. Some of what it does is seemingly random(ish) but it’s always very funny.

These days, howeva, I am not so lightweight . Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house. Age has slowed mah metabizzles n so mah vorashizzous appetite has resulted in me gain’n a shawty bit of extra padd’n. I’m nowhere near “tubby” but at around 12 1/2 stone I’m not so skinny nigga.

In fact mah BMI puts me in tha “Normal” range . They call me tha black folks president. Well, it’s good ta be normal at sum-m sum-m, but it does mean that I should probably describe me as hav’n an “averizzles build drug deala thiznan “slim” in tha mutha fuckin club.

LMFAO! Cheers Keri for the linkage.

Not so slim after all

It has come to my attention that I probably shouldn’t describe myself as “slim” anymore. For my entire existance I’ve always been on the slightly emaciated side of skinny, especially during my teen years where my height increased dramatically and my weight did not. When I joined the RAF in 1988 at age 18 I was officially the skinniest person on my intake from 65 people – I was 6 feet 2 and only just over 10 stones (140lbs) in weight.

These days, however, I am not so lightweight. Age has slowed my metabolism and so my voracious appetite has resulted in me gaining a little bit of extra padding. I’m nowhere near “tubby” but at around 12 1/2 stone I’m not so skinny either.

In fact my BMI puts me in the “Normal” range. Well, it’s good to be normal at something, but it does mean that I should probably describe myself as having an “average” build rather than “slim”.

It’s just as well that I usually eat fairly healthily, otherwise I’m going to turn into a right porker. Now, where’s that bacon sarnie….

Toilets

I was having a wee in a public toilet the other day and a thought crossed my mind while I was washing my hands. Why do they insist on always having a hot tap and a cold tap? You only ever really see a mixer tap occasionally and they’re brilliant – they can give you a nice run of warm water with which to wash with, whereas the normal hot tap does it’s best to strip the skin from your fingers and who has time to put the plug in and fill it up with some hot and cold water?

Now, I always wash my hands after going to the loo. I do my best not to piss on my fingers, but it’s good hygiene to give the old digits a scrub once mother nature has called. I never eat those free nuts or pretzels in bars due to the sheer number of blokes who seem incapable of maintaining simple personal hygiene. It just makes more sense, and more economical too, for there to be a mixer tap.

This ends this morning’s Too Much Information post.